Sunshine pouring through my windows, soaking up the warmth of the moment. Looking up into the sky, not a cloud in sight. Melodies drifting in from the happy birds playing outside...what peace, what calm, what a difference from the unexplainable turmoil inside....a window to the inside is opening......"I dont understand these crashing waves of emotions. I have returned to You again and again asking, seeking, struggling, wrestling with my thoughts, Your thoughts, my will, Your will. Relentlessly I have sought Your will and listend to Your voice or at least tried to listen...sometimes its oh so faint in the mist of my storming thoughts. Day after day i have pounded your ear with my questions. What do you want from me? What is your will? This restlessnes bubbling inside does not make sense. Am I not called to this? Am I not loving people? Am I not making an impact?"
a quiet voice whispers...."yes,... you are called, through you people have felt my love..with these answers, do you think you are making an impact?"
"Ok, so why are you calling me back? why is the desire to return to El Salvador gone? Logic speaks, my own thoughts scream, my understanding justifies me returning to ES...with everything i am doing, for the people..i should return...-should-...how many times do i do things cuz i should, yet it goes no deeper than... -should-...i could return, but there would be a problem, my heart wouldn't be there...it would be for people (a good reason) but not good enough. Ok I surrender, reasoning has been defeated by Your will now becoming my will"
I sought, You answered~ I doubted, Paciently You waited ~ I let go and trusted, You filled me with PEACE.
.....the window to the inside is closing....
This has been a glimpse of my last month in El Salvador. It was an amazing last few months with the people. Precious moments with the children, drawing nearer to the young girls and much unifying with the youth. Yes all the reasons were good for me to return to El Salvador, like i had been planning, but something wasn't right inside. There was no peace. On Jan 1 God gave me a word that I was to move on to a different city. At that time, i doubted and questioned for it didn't make sense to me. I finally gave up and let go. Unspeakable peace and joy have filled my heart since that moment...a moment of TRUST...at that moment i did not know what city, but I could care less cuz, like Abraham, i knew God would guide me step by step.
I am still taking it a step at a time. I love it!!! God is taking care of me, He is the one making plans, not me :)
So far, my steps have led me back to Portland, Oregon where I will be joyously loving people as God leads me in what He wants me to do!!!
Thank you each and every one of you for your constant prayers...they made an IMPACT!!
I will continue to blog as I love to write and God is moving everywhere on this Earth...I am a missionary anywhere and everywhere! Feel free to continue following this journey in the mist of your own exciting journey!
2.28.2009
1.05.2009
come and SEE!!!
Vision- What do you see when you walk in a room? What do you see when you look at the sky? When a bird chirps, do you look for it? When sunlight hits your eyes do you block it out? When darkness falls do you look up to the lights in the sky?
Vision- Is what people have called your future...how do you see your tomorrow? My question is not how do you see your tomorrow, but how do you see your today?
Leaning against an empty booth, watching the people come in and out.... in and out...a young girl stared wide eyed wondering how many more people could fit into that already crowded store. The word had gotten out, daughters calling mothers, mothers calling daughters, brothers calling sisters, friends calling friends. Their is a a big sale come and SEE! come and SEE! come and SEE what?.... a sale...some clothes, some shoes, some socks, maybe a belt...
Vision- Is what people have called your future...how do you see your tomorrow? My question is not how do you see your tomorrow, but how do you see your today?
Leaning against an empty booth, watching the people come in and out.... in and out...a young girl stared wide eyed wondering how many more people could fit into that already crowded store. The word had gotten out, daughters calling mothers, mothers calling daughters, brothers calling sisters, friends calling friends. Their is a a big sale come and SEE! come and SEE! come and SEE what?.... a sale...some clothes, some shoes, some socks, maybe a belt...
An echo is heard far far in the distance...............
Leaning against an empty booth, stopping her world to hear a faint echo from another world...an echo few hear, few take the time to stop and listen....listen...can you hear it?
Where is this echo coming from? Its not coming from the crowd, no its coming from a far away land, its resonating over and over.....come and SEE! come and SEE!....come and SEE what?........a child wrapped in swadling clothes, lying in a manger....a Savior who is Christ the Lord.....Yes!! Yes!! that is the echo being heard! Throughout eternity this echo can not be stopped, it resonated before it became reality and will continue to penetrate the reality of tomorrow colliding with a second echo...an echo of promise, an echo of hope, an echo of love, an echo of VISION...."why do you stand gazing up into heaven? This same Jesus who was taken up from you into heaven will so come in like manner as you saw Him go into heaven." Acts 1:10
What is Your VISION? Where is your gaze?
What is Your VISION? Where is your gaze?
"Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth." Col 3:2........
The echo was once again heard in a small village in El Salvador as I watched my children perform a Christmas play that we had been practicing for two months now!! Two other teachers and I were very proud of each child. They were excellent at each part: Joseph, Mary, sheep, donkey, angels, shepherds and four other main characters who we added to help tell the most AMAZING STORY!
12.04.2008
Unveiled Secrets
Evaporated days mingle with the present. Significance in the now, making each moment count where you are. Consumed with thoughts of where you want to be, who you want to be, your future, your destiny. The question is not where you will be tomorrow, the question is where are you now?
Last Saturday, I was given the privilege of sharing with the youth. God spoke through me declaring His love for each one, His amazing plan for each one. So many of them feel trapped where they are at and see no way of fulfilling their dreams (the dream God has given them).
Ask any child what they want to be, you will get a quick answer. Ask a youth what they want to be, with some hesitation they may answer. Ask an adult what they want to be, they will probably think that question is for a child.
Aren't we to be like children to enter the kingdom of God(Mt 18:3)....where has that freedom gone? where has that joy gone? Hopes drowned, dreams crushed...hearts torn....given away to complacency and mediocracy.
Here, each year completed in school is a victory, so many drop out of school. Reasons vary why kids drop out, for some it may be money, others may have to work to help support their family, others just plain don’t want to or don’t see the point.
Whatever the reason, a dream is on the verge of being destroyed if it hasn't already......
I believe its not too late..Its never too late. The time is now for YOU to dream the dreams God has for you. "Your bones were not hidden from Him, when You were made in secret...and in His book are written the days fashioned for you." (Ps 139)
It is our choice every day to walk towards that which God has spoken over us.
"Your today is tomorrow and your tomorrow is today" ~Jorge Caminos
Thank you for your prayers, they are definitely felt 1000 of miles away!! :)
Last Saturday, I was given the privilege of sharing with the youth. God spoke through me declaring His love for each one, His amazing plan for each one. So many of them feel trapped where they are at and see no way of fulfilling their dreams (the dream God has given them).
Ask any child what they want to be, you will get a quick answer. Ask a youth what they want to be, with some hesitation they may answer. Ask an adult what they want to be, they will probably think that question is for a child.
Aren't we to be like children to enter the kingdom of God(Mt 18:3)....where has that freedom gone? where has that joy gone? Hopes drowned, dreams crushed...hearts torn....given away to complacency and mediocracy.
Here, each year completed in school is a victory, so many drop out of school. Reasons vary why kids drop out, for some it may be money, others may have to work to help support their family, others just plain don’t want to or don’t see the point.
Whatever the reason, a dream is on the verge of being destroyed if it hasn't already......
I believe its not too late..Its never too late. The time is now for YOU to dream the dreams God has for you. "Your bones were not hidden from Him, when You were made in secret...and in His book are written the days fashioned for you." (Ps 139)
It is our choice every day to walk towards that which God has spoken over us.
"Your today is tomorrow and your tomorrow is today" ~Jorge Caminos
Thank you for your prayers, they are definitely felt 1000 of miles away!! :)
11.07.2008
Ashes to Beauty
Little Girl, Little Girl where are your tears? Is your anguish too deep for a tear? is Your heart too numb with shame to let out that mournful wail hidden so deep within? That day so long ago when loving arms of a father surrounded you and sweet kisses of a mother covered every fear, was it true or only a vague passing dream in this nightmare you now live in.....why? oh why little girl did you leave your Fathers side?
So small, so innocent: walking into that bar, only seven years old. What were you thinking?
So beautiful, so trusting: looking into his face with your big blue eyes. Could you not see his evil grin?
So young, so free: with one single reach you were taken away to be a prisoner of hell; held captive to a man's lust. Was there no way out?
A wrenching cry from a young girl's heart echos in the silence of eternity. Years have come and gone, ten in counting, one question fills your mind...why? "Why was I born to live death?"
Now your locked behind bars, hopeless and desperate wondering if there is no way out....
Little Girl, Little Girl, can you hear me? Can you not hear the Father's never ending sobs? Can you not hear Him calling you by name? Can you not hear His heart beat for you? He longs to wrap you in His arms and wipe away your every tear?
Surrender my child, let me loose the bonds of wickedness that envelops you, undo every burden that has oppressed you, let me whisper words of love into your ear and tell you how I LOVE YOU, how I will never abuse you.
Rest in my tender embrace, bask in my gentle presence let it be a balm to your hurting being.
I AM here,
Come to ME..........~ I Will Turn Your Ashes into BEAUTY~
So small, so innocent: walking into that bar, only seven years old. What were you thinking?
So beautiful, so trusting: looking into his face with your big blue eyes. Could you not see his evil grin?
So young, so free: with one single reach you were taken away to be a prisoner of hell; held captive to a man's lust. Was there no way out?
A wrenching cry from a young girl's heart echos in the silence of eternity. Years have come and gone, ten in counting, one question fills your mind...why? "Why was I born to live death?"
Now your locked behind bars, hopeless and desperate wondering if there is no way out....
Little Girl, Little Girl, can you hear me? Can you not hear the Father's never ending sobs? Can you not hear Him calling you by name? Can you not hear His heart beat for you? He longs to wrap you in His arms and wipe away your every tear?
Surrender my child, let me loose the bonds of wickedness that envelops you, undo every burden that has oppressed you, let me whisper words of love into your ear and tell you how I LOVE YOU, how I will never abuse you.
Rest in my tender embrace, bask in my gentle presence let it be a balm to your hurting being.
I AM here,
Come to ME..........~ I Will Turn Your Ashes into BEAUTY~
10.22.2008
Source of Life
The time has come, the buzzing starts. It will not be silenced without a touch from the sleeper.....
Wake up little one, wake up! Its a new day, a new beginning. An adventure is awaiting you, if you will only wake up!
One hit....ahhhhh peace and quiet. Five more minutes will make all the difference in the world...close your eyes and sink into that unconscious state. One....the dream is returning, the world out there is becoming clear .....two.....back to where the conversation was left off......three.....what were you saying? Did you really say what i thought you did?....four...say it again just to be sure.....five...times up....you will not hear it again.
Buzz...buzz..no that is not what you were saying..hurry say it again...its too late, you are brought back to reality. Buzz...should I try it again?..buzz...a second hit.....blankets cover your face trying to block out any light. Will it work? Can I return to that place once again.....no, not this time. Life has begun and you can not keep Him waiting any longer.
Someone is drawing you out of your slumber, out of your conformity, out of your imaginary world....a soft voice is gently speaking:"Awaken, my loved one..its a new day, leave the past behind and come to Me. I have something much greater for you than any dream could ever give you. Come be with Me, for I want to fill you and fulfill your desires. In my presence there is fullness of joy, in my presence there is no fear. Courage, freedom, yearning to LIVE, that is what I will give you. When you no longer can go on, I will sustain you! Dont wait five more mintues when you can reach for it NOW! "
Words written to those not wanting to awake, to those that might see life as futile. Life is only futile when you do not draw from the Source of Life: Jesus.
Pray:
The young man who was shot by a gang member a month ago has passed away. He is dancing in the presence of the source of Life!!!
We pray for comfort for his fiance, his parents, his brother...may God envelope them in His arms at this time.
Wake up little one, wake up! Its a new day, a new beginning. An adventure is awaiting you, if you will only wake up!
One hit....ahhhhh peace and quiet. Five more minutes will make all the difference in the world...close your eyes and sink into that unconscious state. One....the dream is returning, the world out there is becoming clear .....two.....back to where the conversation was left off......three.....what were you saying? Did you really say what i thought you did?....four...say it again just to be sure.....five...times up....you will not hear it again.
Buzz...buzz..no that is not what you were saying..hurry say it again...its too late, you are brought back to reality. Buzz...should I try it again?..buzz...a second hit.....blankets cover your face trying to block out any light. Will it work? Can I return to that place once again.....no, not this time. Life has begun and you can not keep Him waiting any longer.
Someone is drawing you out of your slumber, out of your conformity, out of your imaginary world....a soft voice is gently speaking:"Awaken, my loved one..its a new day, leave the past behind and come to Me. I have something much greater for you than any dream could ever give you. Come be with Me, for I want to fill you and fulfill your desires. In my presence there is fullness of joy, in my presence there is no fear. Courage, freedom, yearning to LIVE, that is what I will give you. When you no longer can go on, I will sustain you! Dont wait five more mintues when you can reach for it NOW! "
Words written to those not wanting to awake, to those that might see life as futile. Life is only futile when you do not draw from the Source of Life: Jesus.
Pray:
The young man who was shot by a gang member a month ago has passed away. He is dancing in the presence of the source of Life!!!
We pray for comfort for his fiance, his parents, his brother...may God envelope them in His arms at this time.
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